June is starting out with more of the same. Any gathering over 10 people being “illegal” has eliminated weddings, church services, little league games, family reunions, club meetings, and just about anything else that would be the hallmark of “normal” life this time of year. Still, we are all here, we are all as healthy as we would have been without the virus, and I suspect, we are all looking forward to human contact again. As a raging introvert, this hasn’t been all that hard for me, as I’m quite comfortable NOT being around other people. I will say, though, when I stopped by my attorney’s office for some real quick divorce stuff and she gave me a hug and told me she was glad to see me, well, I have to admit it made my day.
Thanks to everyone who attended the May demo on mini birdhouses with long finials. I appreciate the engagement from those who attended live, and those who watched the recording later. The YouTube channel is up and running, so CIW club members can watch the last two online demos via links stored at the “Tips and Techniques” tab on the website. The board has been busy making plans to mitigate impacts of the current situation and looking toward the near future. The June demo will also be online via Facebook Live, then stored on the club’s YouTube channel. The topic will be how to turn a three-cornered box. The July cookout has been canceled. Once we know more about when or if we’ll be allowed to meet in groups larger than 10, we’ll make an assessment on rescheduling it or just waiting for the Christmas potluck. We’re looking now at contingencies for online demos for the rest of the year if this pandemic response keeps going that long. On the bright side, as I’ve been working with Ron to line up demonstrations for the rest of the year, we have discovered something unusual. This is the first time either of us can remember having more club members offering to do a demo than we have open slots! Now THAT is a sure sign our club is getting stronger!
As a reminder, if you’ve been turning things during the lockdown, please post a quick pic on our Facebook group (if you do Facebook) so we can see what you’ve been up to. I really miss seeing the creativity and skill that’s normally on display during the club meetings, and this is about as close as we’re likely to come for a while. With each month that passes, I suspect there are people like me who are sitting on a stack of completed projects and president’s challenges, just waiting for the next meeting. Once we know when the live meetings will resume, we’ll figure out how to get through them all. We’ll also most likely be altering the rules that say how many President’s Challenge pieces can be brought, per meeting, but changing the way we do the show and tell part of the meeting so we’re not there till midnight.
As for myself, I’ve been trying to get back in the swing of making things. The shop is at least in a “barely useable” stage, meaning it’s possible to turn again and sharpen tools, but much of what I would normally have access to is still buried in a box. This past memorial day, I got up really early and went to the garage to shuffle more stuff and got sidetracked into working on some projects. A couple of hours later, I came back in the house, holding them in my hands. One of them was the last part of a group collaboration challenge that Bob Adam, Jeff Hindman, and I have been working on for the president’s challenge. With the coloring done and the woodburning finished, all that was remaining was to put on a coat of clear, matte, finish. Daughter #5 was in the kitchen and immediately homed in on the project. Not to give anything away, but like the wig stand effort, what we’ve come up with as our collaboration has an infinite number of embellishments that can be made. Her immediate comment was, “this is really cool, Dad, can I do one, too”? Then she proceeded to tell me that it would be a steam-punk based project, but I’d have to make the top a little different for her so she could morph it into a steampunk airship and I might have to help her do some carving so the gears she would be adding could be integrated into the design. When I told her this was a “one time deal” for the collaboration challenge, she seemed genuinely disappointed.
Later, two other daughters called to say they had decided they were coming over, with the grandkids, to spend the holiday at Papa’s house. That will ALWAYS be fine with me, but for legal reasons, I feel compelled to mention that there were less than 10 people, in total, who attended! As the grandbabies were playing in the wading pools, the fire was slowly burning down for the hot dog roast, and the cooler was being restocked with beer, Daughter #2 saw my two contributions to the collaboration project sitting on the counter. Her immediate reaction was “These are really cool, Dad, can I do one, too?” As she held it up, she proceeded to tell me what kind of pattern she’d be burning into it and what colors she would use to mimic a tie-dye look that would go over the top of the woodburning. Daughter #3 chimed in and said, “that’ll be pretty, but on mine, I’m going to have dad make the top hollow, then I can turn it into a birdcage and put cat figurines at the bottom, trying to climb up”. I reminded them both, and #5 who was listening to see if my answer changed, these were a “one-time deal” and was immediately hit with three sets of puppy dog eyes – 4 deep brown, 2 haze, somehow all looking very needy – each imploring me to agree to their request. I told them if I made any more, I already had plans for what I’d be doing with them.
That brought on demands for me to explain my plans. In hindsight, I should have just changed the conversation, but I’m an idiot! Now, I realize they wanted to know what I was thinking because A) that meant there was a chance more would be made, and B) if more were made and their ideas were better than my ideas, they would be able to use a pack approach and take down their prey. Trust me, they are exceptionally skilled at hunting in a pack! I calmly told them if I made more, it would be a holiday-themed display, like a Christmas village.
In 2.5 seconds, I realized I had just said the worst thing possible. By the time their conversations ended, they had a fully formulated plan on what was to happen next. The good news was I was no longer being expected to make them each an individual item for them to decorate and I could make whatever set I wanted for myself.
The bad news just spewed out after that! Keep in mind the collaboration that Bob, Jeff, and I are making consists of 6 turned pieces for the “set”. I was now expected to make enough so they could each have a set they could decorate for Halloween, Christmas, and Easter. 3 daughters x 3 sets each x 6 pieces per set comes out to 54 pieces I’d be making! After those were done, they liked my idea, but thought it would be better if it was a set for each season (spring, summer, fall, and winter) so they’d have something to set out in between the holidays. That’s another 72! After I was done with those, they agreed the next step would be to make sets for the “minor holidays” like St. Patrick’s day and Independence day. Add in another 36 and their revised plan would have me making 162 more!
They did, however, offer to pay for the wood and would only need to borrow my wood burner, my India inks, the acrylic paint, the Jo Sonia paint, the metal reactive paint, some kind of finish, and perhaps my boredom, but they agreed amongst themselves to let me do all the epoxy work if they needed it.
Then, they started brainstorming ideas on how to decorate all their different sets. #5 had the suggestion of adding LED lights to simulate fireworks on her 4th of July set and asked how I could turn them to make that possible. Daughter #3 was all about how to make something that would look like fake slime she could use on one of her Halloween items, assuming, of course, I could make the top look like a witch’s kettle and simulate bubbles in the slime I was to also create. She might also need a change in the overall dimensions, because of the shelf she intends to use as a display, but I could work that out later. Daughter #2 was already googling what kind of tiny Christmas embellishments Hobby Lobby sold and was reminding me about the “water drop effect painting” I had done in the past and how cool it would fit into her spring set.
About then, the phone rang and it was daughter #4 calling from Phoenix. My hope was the earlier conversation would be forgotten, but When #4 said, “what are you guys doing today?” the answer was a recap of all the planning that has just occurred on the “family art project”.
In 1.25 seconds, #4 said she and daughter #1 was “all in” and another 108 had been added to the total, so the two daughters in Phoenix could make their sets, too. Damn!
As luck would have it, my grandson pushed his big sister into the pool, which is the toddler equivalent of the assassination of an Arch Duke! As I went to calm the hostility, make sure there were no permanent owies, and try not to laugh at the massive smile on the little brother’s face, I started doing the math. Somehow, the two items I had made for the collaboration challenge had ballooned into 270 more and I’m now living in fear of them figuring out that both granddaughters have 6 letters in their names, and the grandson’s each have 5, leaving room for a baseball, picture holder, or a last name initial.
Oh, and Bob and Jeff, if you’re reading this, I highly suggest you NOT show the completed project to your wives, kids, mothers-in-law, distant relatives, mailmen, or anyone else, because this could happen to you, too!
Until next time, thanks for reading, stay safe, stay well, and remember to hug those you’re quarantined with!